The Island at the Top of the World

Exploring the frozen Arctic before it's gone

(Please note that this is a previous review from June 2022)

What's it about?

Tonight's nostalgic pic is "The Island at the Top of the World" (Disney, 1974). When Professor Ivarsson (David Hartman) is shanghaied by eccentric Sir Anthony Ross (Donald Sinden) for a desperate mission to find and save his son, he couldn't foresee the incredible adventure that lay before him; airships, lost islands, poodles, Viking warriors and more await in this family friendly adventure!

High seas adventure... In the air!

Let's get to it:

So, here are some of my thoughts on this film: First, I'm not sure whether it's the print that they used for the transfer or the photography techniques employed during filming, but this production looks terrible. There hasn't been any digital restoration as near as I can tell, as film artifacts and what appears to be burn-in or schmutz on the transfer equipment are persistent throughout.

Also: Puppies!

Second, Disney used the same film techniques that they had been using for decades when they made this. Green screen backgrounds, models, elaborate soundstage sets, stock footage, and plenty of on-location shots compose this film.

Those foreground Vikings look so "there" (just kidding).

Combined with the degraded filmstock, this movie seems like something from an earlier period than when it was actually filmed.

It seriously looks like something from the 1950s sometimes.

I have to say that I love the acting in this film. We have the straight-laced and deep-voiced David Hartman as a rather unconventional heroic lead, the always delightfully hammy Donald Sinden barking orders at his crew, and my personal favorite, Jacques Marin as the highly energetic airship captain, Brieux.

My personal favorite character.

This film is also noteworthy as one of the earliest silver screen appearances of the always delightful Mako playing the Inuit guide, Oomiak.

"Long ago in a distant land, I, Aku, the shape shifting master of darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil!"

Definitely not for everyone.

Is it a good movie? Not especially. It's ugly to the point of being repulsive (the color palette is very off-putting).

Granted, this scene is meant to be off-putting, but does it have to be PURPLE?

There isn't a lot of action, but it's more of an adventure film than an action movie. I do like the effort put into making the old Norse language and sets seem legitimate.

Much of the film is spent traveling to mediocre matte paintings.

Also, they don't do the Star Trek/Doctor Who thing of making all of the other cultures speak perfect English, which I always admire (it's also a good way for the English-speaking characters to pass exposition amongst themselves).

"They're saying that they're capturing us!"

I expected that this would be a terrible joke film, but honestly it isn't bad enough to be a joke, but also not good enough to be very memorable, leaving it in an odd cinematic purgatory.

There's actually a bit of effort put into some of it, but it's still limited by the time it was made.

If you remember seeing it, it's worth checking out again. If you haven't, it is a mildly entertaining glimpse into a transitional period in cinematic history (the "before and after" of Star Wars).

"You don't need to see our identification, fellah!"

Where can you see it?

"The Island at the Top of the World" is currently streaming on Disney+

Unidentified Flying Oddball

Not exactly a Disney classic, but worth a view

Synopsis:

Tonight's nostalgic pic is "Unidentified Flying Oddball" (Disney, 1979). The National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) is getting ready to launch Project Stardust, a brand new ionic-drive space ship with the ability to travel the speed of light, bringing a new era to space exploration.

For something that seems "NASA official," this seems really outdated.

There's just one problem: The senatorial oversight forbids the manned probe from being manned by a human being. To this end, they enlist engineer Tom Trimble (played by the equally alliterative Dennis Dugan) to create a solution in the form of an android doppelganger of Trimble named "Hermes" (also played by Dugan).

Hermes, the paranoid android.

Hermes becomes sentient right before the launch and has an existential crisis about not being able to ever come back to Earth. When Tom comes aboard Stardust to talk to Hermes a bolt of lightning from an oncoming storm causes the ship to launch, damaging Hermes and causing Tom to be the first human being to travel faster than light.

Also the first to go the speed of plaid.

When the probe lands back on Earth, Tom discovers that he has traveled back in time and space to ancient England, where he meets the naïve wench Alisande (Sheila White) and her gander, "Father," that Alisande believes is her father transformed under a curse.

One of the few stringless shots. Still not great.

Cute animals always add to the charm, even though we know today that all geese are evil.

The trio are quickly captured by the aggressive Sir Mordred (Jim Dale) and taken to the court of Camelot to meet King Arthur (Kenneth More in his final role).

Character's original name: Sir Evil of Jerkingwood.

Assume that this takes place before the fall of Arthur, as it's unusual to see a cast this old playing knights.

Using his pluck and amazing space-age gizmos, Tom quickly wins over the king and makes enemies of Mordred and the wizard Merlin (Ron Moody).

Original character name: Baddie McSinister.

When Tom happens upon a plot to subvert the king and steal his land, he quickly rallies to the rescue with the help of Hermes, Alisande, and squire Clarence (Rodney Bewes). Can Tom battle the insurrectionists and repair the Stardust to find his way home?

Does this pile of bodies answer your question?

The edges, sanded off

This 1979 comedy is a very loose adaptation of "A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court" by Samuel "Mark Twain" Clemens. Most of the cast of characters is different, the story uses humor and goofy solutions to problems that are solved rather violently and heavy-handed in the book, and the more mystical elements of the novel are ignored completely in favor of scientific reality.

Oh, and completely fantastical LASER guns.

Filmed on location in Northumberland, England, it features beautiful outdoor sets on the English countryside as well as spacious indoor locations. The score is typical low-budget Disney for the time in that it's barely memorable (a particular disappointment since the film goes out of its way to name drop Fleetwood Mac and The Rolling Stones), but it's pretty benign. It's a G-rated film, and pretty deserving of it: There are no obvious on-screen deaths despite numerous scenes of swordplay and a rather robust battle scene at the end of the film, and even though there are scenes of destruction and threats of violent death they are usually pre-disarmed by Tom's scientific know-how, so don't be afraid to watch this with young children.

LASER guns? Mirrors.

Swordfight to the death? Magnets.

Burning at the stake? Heatproof spacesuit.

Emblematic of the era (not necessarily for the better)

This was made by Disney at a time when the studio was consistently churning out theatrical duds. The upside is that we can enjoy their goofiness now, but at the time these films weren't money-makers. The special effects were not state-of-the-art even at the time, and have aged pretty badly since then, so don't expect to be dazzled with amazing visuals. In particular, any scene involving flying objects (and there are a few) has pretty obvious strings.

You can even sort of see the strings in this still image.

The jokes aren't exactly high comedy, but they're worth a chuckle or two and very appropriate for younger audiences (there's several scenes where an adult magazine is passed between characters, but it's not dwelled upon.

My thoughts:

I love this film: It's silly, it's utterly toothless, but it's not boring and it's just cheesy enough to make it worth a watch.

Not convinced? Look at this "Headless" astronaut.

Where can you see it?

"Unidentified Flying Oddball" is currently streaming on Disney+.

 

The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean

Paul Newman's favorite role, for your consideration

The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean

What's it about?

Tonight's nostalgic pic is "The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean" (First Artists, 1972). Roy Bean (Paul Newman) isn't a bad man by his own account, despite being a wanted criminal on the lam. When he stops in the wastelands of Texas for a drink at a run-down brothel, he recounts his most recent successful criminal enterprise, which the patrons respond to by beating him within an inch of his life, robbing him, putting a noose around his neck and letting his horse drag him into the desert.

Honestly, what did he think would happen?

Unfortunately for them, the rope breaks. Looked after by a local girl, Roy Bean asks for his gun, which she brings to him. After unleashing his fury upon those who wronged him, the newly reborn Bean decides that he's going to bring law and order to the west… At the end of a rope.

The lounge arm of the law.

The rest of the film follows "Judge" Roy Bean as he uses his loose interpretation of the law to bring justice to the streets of the town of Vinegaroon, all the while amassing a personal fortune for himself and his marshals ("reformed" criminals that he deputizes) as well as a large graveyard outside of town.

The marshals and their "justly" gotten gains.

Soon, Vinegaroon is prospering, a safe haven for law-abiding citizens and a scourge criminals across the west, all while he professes his love to his never-seen amore, stage performer Miss Lilly Langtry (Ava Gardner).

Bean's real love, Lilly Langtry.

We watch as various characters speak of their interactions with Roy Bean. We see him dispense justice, fall in love, adopt a bear, experience tragedy and loss, and come back in heroic fashion.

Falling in love... with a bear.

Some background on the film

This long-forgotten western was written by prominent screenwriter John Milius and directed by Hollywood legend John Huston (who also has a cameo in the film as "Grizzly" Adams). It's a peculiar blend of goofy hayseed sensibilities, old west gunplay, and gallows humor.

Literal. Gallows. Humor.

It's a highly fictionalized version of the life of real Justice of the Peace Roy Bean, who was the original progenitor of the "hanging judge" stereotype. I need to stress that most of this film's narrative is manufactured, particularly the invention of antagonist Frank Gass (Roddy McDowall), whose name is a both an obvious metaphor for the Texas oil industry as well as a well-hidden verbal joke (after Bean's there is Gass).

"What are you trying to pass, Gass?"

A diamond in the rough

From a technical aspect, this film is a bit lacking, but it's really just a hallmark of lower budget films of the time. The lighting is off in many scenes, resulting in dark foregrounds in front of backlighting, and it's obviously not a stylistic choice.

Backlit shots; not necessarily a style.

The audio is uneven, and is quite quiet in certain spots, much of it on-set recording rather than ADR. There's not a lot of action, and the dialog isn't especially punchy, but if you pay attention it's very rewarding and provides a lot of character.

A bit adult in tone

Please note that this is a hard PG film. There's a lot of death, but not a lot of blood and gore. There isn't a lot of swearing, but there are a few derogatory racial slurs without much minority representation. While this is typical "of the time," I'm just throwing it out there so that if you're interested it doesn't catch you off guard.

This scene uses the "N" word multiple times.

My thoughts

I love this movie, and I'm not alone: This was allegedly Paul Newman's favorite role. Roy Bean is a complex antihero, but he's also trying to be just and right. He's flawed but trying to be pious and the conflict therein is a joy to watch.

You get to see the town rise and fall with Bean.

There's a lot of cameos from various 70s character actors of the time, sometimes playing allies, but usually playing the victims of Roy Bean's judgement.

I honestly didn't recognize Stacey "Mike Hammer" Keach as "Bad Bob"

There's genuine love that develops between Bean and his ward Maria Elena (Victoria Principal) and their pet bear.

The bear is a delight in every scene.

There are a few genuine moments in this film that I will not hesitate to admit make me cry. The passing of Roy Bean into legend is heartfelt and the "heroes' last stand" moment near the end of the film is fantastic, even if it has very little to do with the actual man the movie is based on.

Humor and tragedy go hand-in-hand.

Where can you find it?

"The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean" is streaming on… nothing. Well… It's available on VHS (where I first watched it), on DVD and even on Blu-ray, but you'd be hard pressed to find it in stores. I found it for rent and purchase on Amazon Prime, but honestly I don't see much benefit in getting it in high-definition (the audio is mono anyway). If you're interested, watch it any way you can.

The Adventures of Bullwhip Griffin

Grab your bullwhip, tip your gryphon.

What's it about?

Tonight's nostalgia pic is "The Adventures of Bullwhip Griffin" (Disney, 1967). When the Flagg family's patriarch and the grandfather of Arabella (Suzanne Pleshette) and her brother Jack (Bryan Russell) dies unexpectedly, he leaves a generous amount of his vast fortune to his housekeeping staff including his mild-mannered butler, Eric Griffin (played charmingly by Roddie McDowall).

This is the face of adventure, folks!

There's just one problem: His fortune was long since secretly depleted, leaving the survivors in utter poverty. Regaled with tales of "Bullwhip Brannigan" and his pulp novel adventures of the gold rush west, young Jack runs away to seek his fortune. Griffin promises Arabella that he will bring Jack back, and tracks him to a ship bound for San Francisco.

The blue-eyed love interest, Arabella.

Jack stows away on a ship bound or San Francisco Bay.

Jack has met British actor Quentin Bartlett (Richard Haydn), who is being shadowed by an unknown person seeking his map to the "mother lode," a vein of gold that would lead to obscene wealth.

How did an unemployed actor wind up with a treasure map? Keep wondering.

After mistakenly assaulting Griffin and accidentally stranding him on the departing ship, Bartlett offers Griffin and Jack partnership in return for their aid in evading his mysterious assailant, who turns out to be "Judge" Higgins (Karl Malden), a devious thief and conman.

We are introduced to Judge Higgins.

The rest of the movie follows the adventures of Griffin and Jack as they make their way across the west, alternatively in pursuit of and being pursued by the identity-switching Judge Higgins while seeking the mother lode.

Stage coach robbery (before highway robbery was invented, probably).

Along the way they will become embroiled in the bustle of the booming city of San Francisco, find and lose fortunes, make new enemies, and build the legend of "Bullwhip Griffin."

Bullwhip and Jack pursue Judge Higgins.

Some details

This is a mostly forgotten comedy western that is similar to but predates films like "Support Your Local Sheriff!" and Disney's own "The Apple Dumpling Gang." Unlike many previous comedy western films, this movie embraces absurdist tropes of 60s cinema, including cartoonish scene transitions, comedically sped-up action sequences, and ridiculous visual gags; they really come out in the bare-knuckle boxing match between Griffin and the Golden Nugget Saloon's bouncer "Mountain Ox" (Mike Mazurki).

Most of the movie's action is reserved for this sequence.

Seems more like a giant spoiled three-year-old than an actual villain.

The movie absolutely doesn't take itself seriously.

Karl Malden's Judge Higgins is less of a sinister villain and more of a comedic foil for the heroes, with an array of ridiculous disguises and ludicrous excuses for his villainy.

Wherever gold teeth can be pulled, Judge Higgins will be there!

Wherever a buck can be made, Judge Higgins will be there!

Less lovable is Harry Guardino, who perfectly portrays sleezy saloon owner Sam Trimble, arguably the real villain of the movie.

Capitalist Sam Trimble (left): The film's real villain?

My thoughts

I really liked this movie. McDowall makes an unlikely leading man; Griffin is honorable, steadfast, clever, and friendly while remaining meek and humble. The villains act as more obstacles than outright evil, while even an ill-tempered monster like the witless Mountain Ox can be redeemed by the end.

His ludicrous strength on display, Mountain Ox lifts Griffin by his... Cummerbund?

The drawn title sequences and occasional transitions enhance the comic nature, and the goofy elements transform what could have been a mean-spirited bloody affair into a family-friendly journey that while short on action is high on charm.

Griffin is green with envy.

Spoilers: "Of the time" usually means "racist"

Please note that the version I reviewed is NOT the original cut of the film. There are some pretty culturally insensitive references sprinkled throughout the film, and the current streaming version uses truncated cuts and alternative ADR to soften the blow. Judge Higgins disguising himself as a Chinese immigrant is one of the worst offenders, so please be aware that stuff like this is in the film and should be discussed with family members who might be more impressionable.

At least he's playing a white man pretending to be Asian, and not the usual "white man cast as Asian" *sigh*

Where can you watch it?

"The Adventures of Bullwhip Griffin" predates modern content ratings, but I would say that it is a solid "PG" movie, with threats of violence, depictions of alcohol and tobacco use, gunshots without any actual death, and absolutely no swearing or nudity. It is currently streaming on Disney+.

Not Strange Enough, Sadly

Strange World? More Like Ordinary World.

Like many people, I wasn't aware that "Strange World" (Disney, 2022) even existed: I saw one brief commercial for it on the television at work and nothing else. I began to see reviews of it trickling in that all seemed to bemoan Disney's lack of promotion for this film over any real criticism of it, and I have to say... I didn't like it.

What's it about?

This is the story of an expedition to an underground world cut off from the surface, where mankind must save its most precious natural resource from disaster. Along the way they discover that what they seek to preserve may not be what they first intended.

I will just say it: This is a pretty bad movie.

Not all is lost 

First, its good points: The animation is spectacular. It's got a really colorful palette, characters squash and stretch like they should and solidifies that the stiff computer animation of years gone by is a thing of the past. The design aesthetic is solid, with a steampunk-inspired flavor, and living, breathing textures for the environments and creatures. I cannot fault the visuals.

I personally don't care that same-sex relationships are depicted in the movie (I know that some people do care; we call them "bigots"). It's not a central focus of the story but it's still nice to see diversity in any studio film.

So much for the good points...

I really wanted to like it, I really did

The story is awful. It is cliche to a fault on every single level; the father and son legacy conflict is some of the most hamfisted I have ever seen, the twist of the expedition was telegraphed from the beginning moments, the pointless conflict at the end is almost as half-baked as its resolution. Main characters are given rushed backstories while ancillary characters fade almost completely into the background, meanwhile the same two story beats are endlessly repeated.

Even a bad story could be salvaged with a good enough cast, but the actors they hired are not known for voicework and it shows in their performances. Jake Gyllenhaal's subdued delivery alone was disappointing, but add Dennis Quaid trying to sound like the cartooniest of cartoon characters and the contrast just doesn't mesh. Add some of the blandest dialog and misfired jokes I have heard in the last twenty years of major studio animation and you have nothing remotely quotable to remember it by.

The score was written by the same composer as "Big Hero 6," but while serviceable there's no standout music here to get your blood pumping, probably because there is no "first flight" moment in this entire movie.

In short, this is a beautifully visualized film with a mediocre plot, an annoyingly obvious twist, and an underutilized cast. If you missed it, don't feel bad: You didn't miss much.

Where can you see it?

"Strange World" is currently streaming on Disney+ if you're somehow still interested.